Just then, the telephone rang.
Jenna groaned. “Chehhh...” she mumbled as she slid her feet off the table and sat up. “Looks like breaktime's over.”
She put out her cigarette on the ash tray and let the phone ring a couple more times before answering. “Queen of Hearts Delivery and Bounty Hunter Agency. Can you be helped?”
She listened for a moment and then slowly answered, “Yeah, that does sound delicious but you want Hakeem's Thaiwanese Rice Tacos downstairs.”
Hanging up, she took out her pack of black cigarettes from the desk drawer and flipped a stick into her mouth all in one smooth, well-practiced move. “We have got to get a new number,” she muttered under her breath as she pushed the drawer back in.
The phone rang again. It was the same guy.
“Look,” Jenna said, “you want the restaurant downstairs. This is the Queen of Hearts Delivery and Bounty Hunter Agency. Hakeem's Thai-- Yeah, we do delivery jobs. Why? Well, sure, we can pick up and deliver your order. No problem. We'll have your sweet and sour pork chimichangas delivered to your doorstep and have you greeted with a smile all for the measly price of one hundred dollars. The cost of the chimichangas not included of course. You'll still have to pay for those.”
“A hundred dollars!?” the phone exclaimed.
“We here at the Queen of Hearts Delivery and Bounty Hunter Agency,” Jenna replied calmly, “pride ourselves in a job well done. We make sure all packages are delivered on time. At any cost. No bandits or thieves or rabid beasts, no assassins or corporate spies or super villains or terrorist organizations will keep us from finishing any job we accept. When you think about it, a hundred dollars is really quite cheap, all things considered. You can rest assured that your precious sweet and sour pork chimichangas will be safe with us. You'll be biting into that delicious, spicy goodness by eight this evening. Hello? Hello?”
Jenna put the phone back down. “Chehhh...”
With a small, black disposable lighter, she lit the cigarette in her mouth. A couple of quick puffs followed a long drag. She had hardly finished exhaling the sweet-smelling smoke when the telephone went off again.
“Hello? Queen of Hearts Delivery and Bounty Hunter Agency. Wholesale destruction costs extra. Hello? Oh, it's you, Steven. What's up? Mallet Girl? She's not back yet. Sent her out this morning to look for some dude. Yeah? Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Yeah, I'll tell her. Oh, fine. Just fine. So, dinner's still on this evening? Yeah, see you all this evening then.”
She hung up. Leaning back on her chair, which creaked in protest, she continued smoking. After a while, she hung back her head and shouted at the top of her voice. “Maaaaaaa!!!”
“Whaaaat!?” came the equally vocal reply from the apartment directly above her.
“When Mally gets back,” Jenna hollered back, “tell her Steven called!”
“For the hundredth time, dear, I'm not your secretary! Go tell her yourself!”
“But, Maaaaaaa!”
“Whaaaat!? Oh, fine! I'll tell her! Anything else?”
“Yeah, Steven wants her to know that her order of foam rubber mallets has arrived! Oh, and she needs to buy more mallet polish! The more expensive kind, not the cheap kind!”
“Fine, dear! I'll tell her!”
There was a short pause, long enough for Jenna to sneak a couple of quick puffs on her cigarette, and then her mother yelled, “Jennaaaaa!”
“Whaaaat!?” Jenna replied.
“What do you want for dinner? I feel like having eggplants this evening! And pineapples! How do you feel about pineapples and eggplants?”
“Sounds nice! But I'll be going out tonight!”
“That's great, dear! Have fun! But what do you want for dinner this evening?”
“No, Maaaaa! I'll be out all night! I'll be eating out! Eating out!”
“Whaaaat? Take-out? No, dear! No need for take-out! I'll be cooking dinner!”
“No, Maaaaa! Eating out! I'll be eating out with my friends!”
“Friends? Okay! How many are coming over?”
“No, Maaaaa!”
“Whaaaat? I need to know how many plates to set on the table!”
Jenna covered her face with her palm and slowly shook her head. She must be blow-drying her hair again. Her mother was always messing around with her hair. Jenna took a deep breath and raised her voice even louder. “I won't be eating dinner tonight! I'll be going out!”
“Whaaaaat?”
“Maaaaaaa!!!”
“Whaaaat!?”
“Oh, never mind!”
“Mind? Of course I don't mind! I love having company over!”
Jenna groaned in frustration.
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